Dating an eternal bachelor
Janice Witzel, a psychologist in private practice who is also a consultant at the Family Institute in Chicago.
Such women are often extremely happy, she said, and have far richer emotional lives -- without marriage -- than do their male counterparts.
Thirty percent of the men studied fell into the category of "rigid and satisfied," he said.
These men had few close friends but were not distressed about it.
Twenty percent of the men fell into another category, "flexible and satisfied." They could turn their defenses on and off and they were filled with self-confidence, he said.
Many never-married men are deeply satisfied with their lives as they practice these defenses, Dr. But others are miserable and would like to change but do not know how.
Comparable research on never-married women over 40 shows a dramatically different picture, according to Dr.
Psychologists have long held that men tend to marry "down," choosing women who are less educated and socially privileged than they are, while women choose men who are higher on the socioeconomic ladder. Waehler said, unmarried men are the bottom of the barrel while unmarried women are the cream of the crop. Although alcoholism, poverty, extreme passivity and mental illness are stereotypes that describe some bachelors, Dr.
Waehler said, there are more complex reasons that many men do not get married.
Very little is known about never-married men and women, said Dr.